Microsoft vs "the Real World": Battleground Security [humor]

I am sure you've heard this one already, but just for posterity:

ITworld.com - Even the Builders of Windows Find Tech Support a Challenge: "Once upon a time not that very long ago, Microsoft CEO and chief cheerleader Steve Ballmer was attending a friend's child's wedding. One of the parents complained that his PC had slowed to a crawl and was performing miserably. Would Steve mind having a look?"

What happens next? Read the story!